One Word

01 Jan 2012 8 Comments

by jeanbriese in Family Reflection, Reflections Of A Catholic Woman Tags: , , , , ,

As an extremely goal oriented person, New Year’s is a great time for me.  I love the idea that the New Year is a blank page and I can write whatever I want on my page.  So for years, I would take the entire month to come up with my goals. At one point I even had categories for my goals; personal, financial, career, health, home, etc.    I know it sounds obsessive, and I suppose it was, but it really worked for me.  Probably because I didn’t stress on the goals, I simply dreamt them up and then tucked them away. The way I figured it,  I would do my best and whatever happened, I still came out ahead.  So I always enjoyed at the end of each year, pulling out my year’s goals and seeing how much I had accomplished. 

A couple of years ago, I heard a new idea being shared about New Year’s resolutions that really intrigued me.  The idea was that most of us make a New Year’s resolution based on a problematic behavior (or two or three) that we have struggled with for years.  So we resolve in January to fix this behavior and by February,  we have long forgotten this resolution.

The suggestion was that our resolutions seldom work because they focus on the type of person we want to become rather than who God wants us to be. So, what if our hopes for the year centered on who God wanted us to become, instead? 

The concept being offered by My One Word organization is, rather than a litany of doomed resolutions, you simply choose one word that is your vision for the year.  When you choose a single word, you have a single focus. You are moving toward the future rather than swearing off the past.  

Hmmm.  One word.   I decided to give it a try.  

To begin,  you envision yourself at the end of the year.  You invite God to assist you in this vision. What kind of person do you want to be, does God want you to be? This process took some time, as I mulled over all the characteristics that I wanted in my life and in my soul.  When you have the vision of the person you want to be at the end of the year, you choose your one word.

In my overly obsessive way, I gathered my children and grandchildren together and asked them to choose one word for their year as well. After all, the journey is always much more fun together!

I loved the words that my family chose.  My oldest daughter, a single mother, was just ending a tough year. She, like many Americans had lost her job, her oldest son had a bicycle accident that resulted in a serious head injury, (he is fully recovered, praise God!) and she was trying to get back on her feet.  She chose abundant as her word.

My grandson Christian, who was just entering high school, chose courageous.  What a great word for a young man embarking on this part of his life!

Madelyn, eight years old at the time, chose trustworthy.  When I asked her why she chose that word, she said because she really wanted to be “Student of the Month” and you had to be trustworthy.  She didn’t know what trustworthy meant, so I was happy to help her look it up in the dictionary and talk about ways she could be trustworthy.

My sweet husband chose cultivate. What a great word.

As for me, after much consideration and so many great words to choose from, I chose the word, light.  My personal mission for many years has been “to be a blessing.”  So I thought my word would be blessing.  But as I meditated and prayed and spent time listening to the Lord, I felt called to go deeper. And soon the word light came to me. Jesus is the Light of the World.   I want to carry that light and share it with everyone, everywhere.  Fear, shame and the enemy live in the darkness, but they can not survive in the light.  I wanted the light of Jesus to always shine through me to everyone.   Light became my word.

It was amazing to see how God worked in our lives after we chose our words.  At a parish mission, Father Dominic Briese (same last name, no relation) offered  a CD called “You are the Light of the World.”  A woman I work with began to seek me out to inquire about her Catholic faith, which she had left. She has now reconciled with her Lord and her faith. Praise Jesus!  Madelyn became “Student of the Month.”  Christian had a terrific freshmen year and is such a courageous young man. Candice found a great job, and her life truly was abundantly blessed as many things turned around for her that year. Our parish has a beautiful rose garden loving cultivated by S.H. (sweet husband).  Wow.   Thank you Jesus, for your unending support and affirmation. If you would like more information about how to choose your one word or support for the journey, visit http://myoneword.org/  For more information on Fr. Briese,  visit   http://briese.opwest.org

 What will be your one word for 2012?

A Prisoner’s Story- The Story of Jim

01 Dec 2011 11 Comments

by jeanbriese in General, Reflections Of A Catholic Woman Tags: , , , ,

He was just eight years old the first time he was incarcerated.  A baby really, a sweet innocent boy whose worst crime was being born to parents who couldn’t figure out their own lives.  A typical youngest child, he was the family clown.  Always sporting a bright smile, always wanting to please, he was adored by his oldest sister.  She, at 10 years of age when he was born, thought of him as her responsibility, as her “baby.”  She would wake at night to feed him when no parents were home and tried to fill the gap as best as a young girl might. 

Neglected, physically and sexually abused, his life had been one of constant shuffling back and forth between divorced, alcoholic parents, who gave little supervision and no direction to this growing boy.   Shuffling, that is, until at six years of age, when his mother went out one night with a boyfriend and did not return. 

It was two weeks before Christmas.

Eventually the food ran out for the children.  His sister asked a neighbor to call the authorities and report that they had not had a parent in the home for about a week, and they had nothing to eat. 

One would have thought things could not get worse.  But oh, this was just the beginning of the descent.  How do you tear apart four children whose only safety net was each other?  There was no room in one foster home for four children.  His oldest sister, now a teen, would have none of it;  she disappeared from his life as she went off to fight her own demons.  His only constant was gone, as his life majorly changed.

Christmas?  It was too close to Christmas to accommodate four more children.  There would be no Santa Claus, no gifts, no Christmas cookies or Christmas cheer.  He must be a very bad boy if Santa isn’t coming.

It shouldn’t have been a surprise to anyone really, when at eight years old, Jimmy became the youngest ever boy at Arizona Boy’s Ranch. You might wonder what crime an eight year old could commit to warrant incarceration.  He was a chronic “runner.”  He wasn’t running away, as much as he was desperately trying to run toward a better life; toward the life he should have been given.  For this he was labeled incorrigible and  locked up with teens the size of men with serious criminal backgrounds.  This little boy’s path went from bad to worse.  The stories he tells of his time here will make you cry.  

At nine years old, he visited his sister for Christmas.  Newly married, in her own home, she and her new husband had cut down a Christmas tree.  Never having done this before, they found a spectacular tree and chopped it down to discover that, because the tree had grown against another tree, the backside was completely bare.  The tree was beautiful from the front, so they took it home and placed it against the wall.  Jimmy was so excited as they decorated the tree.  When it was all done, they placed the angel on top, turned on the lights and stood back to admire the first Christmas tree he had since he was four years old.  Already off-balance because there was only one side to the tree, the weight of all the decorations slowly toppled the tree.  They stood and watched as the beautiful Christmas tree came crashing down.  Jimmy cried and cried.  He was, after all, still a young child of nine and it was too much to watch his hopes for a “normal” Christmas come crashing down.

Sometime in his teen years, he was ready to be released.  His sister wanted him to live with her.  The authorities disagreed.  She now had a family, with two young children of her own.  The authorities felt that Jim needed to be with someone trained to handle “troubled” kids,  someone more mature, that could understand a teen-age boy.  But Sis insisted that he needed the love of his family.  And so Jimmy was released to her care.

He adored her children, and they adored him.  But it wasn’t long before his anger and his troubles brought turmoil to their home.  He stole from them.  He lied.  Indeed, the authorities were right, the young couple did not know best how to deal with his issues.  His sister loved him, but couldn’t put her family at risk.  She too, after all, was fighting for a normal life.  

And so Jim was incarcerated again.  Only for a short time, and then he was released to his dad.  At 17 years old, he was working a summer construction job.  He was 40 feet above the ground, placing beams in a steel frame of a soon to be high-rise building, when the beam fell.  Instinctively, he reached for the falling beam, and as he did so, he tumbled off the beam.  On his way down, his head hit another steel beam.  He hit the ground, and the force of the fall caused his body to bounce back up in the air and hit the ground again.  He was air-lifted to the trauma center, where upon arrival he was so badly swollen from head to toe that he had no facial features, and they could not determine his age.  The x-ray of his skull looked like a jigsaw puzzle, his skull shattered like a clay pot.  His hips, his legs, his arms were all broken.  But would he survive the head injuries?

Jim was a fighter and a survivor.  In a coma and hospitalized for months, he fought his way back to life.  His memory and his spatial judgment are forever affected. He will never be able to work or drive.  As a young man who finally had freedom and was trying to build a life for himself, he was now angrier than he had ever been.  He had years of reconstructive surgery ahead of him, to rebuild his face, his arm, his hip, his leg.  It is perhaps not surprising that his next obstacle in life would become a prescription drug addiction. Too bad all the physical therapy didn’t include emotional support and someone to watch over the prescription drug use; but that was 20 years ago.  One can only hope things are different today.

Today Jim is 43 years old.  He sits in an Arizona prison, a place he has called home for most of his life.  Oh, he has been released a few times, only to face the same issues on the “outside.”   Still not able to work or drive, what else is there to do?  It is only a matter of time until he finds his way back to the drugs.  Most of his time in prison is in protective custody.  No one comes to visit him, he has never made friends outside of prison.  He gets angry at times and punches himself in the face.  He writes to his mother, with requests and tales that are childlike and absurd.  One wonders if he has any sense of reality at all. 

” Lord, when did we see you ill or in prison, and visit you?”   And the King will say to them in reply, “Amen, I say to you, whatever you did for these least brothers of mine, you did for me.”   Matthew 25:40

This Advent season, I will do something I have never done.  I will attempt to visit someone in prison.  I have helped to feed the hungry, I have welcomed strangers, I have clothed the needy, and cared for the ill.  I have never visited someone in prison.  The thought creates a physical reaction in me.  I have been around juvenile institutions and just remembering those visits makes me cry, makes my stomach twist into a tight ball and ache.  And truthfully, over the years I have developed a “tough love” approach to prisoners, reasoning that they are there because they deserve to be.  They are adults, they made their choices, and now they can pay the consequences of their choices. 

On Christ the King Sunday, as we listened to the reading above, the words jumped out at me, “When did we see you in prison and visit you?”  I knew what I had to do.  On the way home, I told my husband that I had often struggled with the part of this reading that speaks to visiting those in prison.  I “justified” it by telling him I had different talents, and I was called to other ministries.  Visiting those in prison is for someone else, someone who can “stomach” it.    My sweet husband, the cop, whom I expected to be embittered and cynical with all he sees in his daily profession, said to me, “You have to remember that not everyone in prison is evil.”  

Indeed.  As I write Jim’s story, I stop every few sentences to cry.  To cry for the sweet innocent boy who loved to make everyone laugh and who never really had a chance in this life.  This Advent, I am going to attempt to visit Jim. Attempt because I have to go through a process to visit a prisoner that could take 60 days.  

Please pray for Jim and please pray for me,  for you see,  Jim is my little brother,  whom I have not seen in years.

This Christmas, let us remember all lost children in our prayers.

 

Jim and Jean in a light-hearted moment before the tree crashed.

 

 

Jim (in front) with our brother and sister. This picture was taken shortly before we were abandoned.

Jimmy before he became a prisoner at eight years old.

Unexpected Christmas Gifts

26 Nov 2011 Leave a Comment

by jeanbriese in Family Reflection, General, Reflections Of A Catholic Woman Tags: , , , ,

In 2008  I was so blessed to be able to go to the Holy Land. I wrote the following during Christmas that year, as a letter to Father Lopez. I now share it with you. 

It was Christmas Day, and we planned to attend the 10:30 Mass.  At 9:45 we were in our bedroom getting ready for Mass when the doorbell rang.  Since we live off of a dirt road and are fairly far from most folks, it is rare that the doorbell rings unexpectedly.  

It was my sister, with whom I had not spoken for five years.  I raised her children, and now I have her biological granddaughter, 16-month-old Alli.  Alli has been in my home for the last three months.  My sister is standing on my doorstep with her arms full of presents and she  wants to see the baby.

Needless to say, we are late getting out the door.  The trip to Church is silent, as we are stressed by being late and by all that has occurred in a few short minutes. Much later I will reflect back and realize that this was a grace to be offered reconciliation on Christmas, and certainly an acceptable reason to be late. And interestingly enough, reconciliation offered because of the birth of a baby.   

But right now, all that escapes me as I dread walking in the door after Mass has begun on Christmas morn. I am just stressed. 

I convince myself that my only alternative is to go home, and so decide that God (and me) would prefer I be late to Mass.   We walk in after the procession has begun. The Church is full.  A familiar face smiles and motions me to a seat… not in my usual section, of course, that is full. I am directed to where the choir would normally sit during their “breaks.” 

The reading centers me.  It is about the shepherds in their fields. It was just a few months ago that I sat in the shepherd’s field. I entered a grotto in the field, decorated to memorialize the event we are hearing about in this reading.   

Over the arch of the cave as you enter are the words “In Excelsis Deo.”  This simple hole in the rock standing in the field, where even today you see shepherds in the outlying fields, is simple and in many ways, not unlike any other cave on a mountainside.  We walk down into the cave and there is a manger scene of the babe, Mary, Joseph, the shepherds and angels.  I seat myself on a rock that seems to have eroded away into a bench. The space is small, and we fill it standing shoulder to shoulder.  And then spontaneously, we break into song, “Gloria! In Excelsis Deo.” The music is absolutely beautiful; it is as if the angels are singing with us. Really.  I am overcome.  I can’t sing; I can’t speak. I feel as if I have stopped breathing and time is frozen.  Tears are rolling uncontrollably down my face. 

I ask myself, “Why, Lord? Why here? Of all the places we have gone and we are to go, why am I overcome in a cave in a field?” And of course, the answer comes to me.  Because I, like the shepherds, have been called to find Jesus. I have spent years coming to my current relationship with Jesus, and I have been called to hop on a plane and travel thousands of miles to see where He was born. To walk where He walked.  To see where He died for me.  And I am near.  Like the shepherds, I am overcome with the glory being presented.  I realize that I am just a shepherd in the field, come to find the King, worship, honor, praise Him, and to share the Good News that He has come for all.  My second Christmas Gift.

As Mass continues, the incense is lit. As the aroma and smoke fill the room, I am transported back to Bethlehem. I am kneeling at the site where our Lord was born.  I am kneeling at the site where His manger was believed to sit.  The incense burns here all the time.  I never thought I would appreciate the incense as much as I do now. 

During the Liturgy of the Eucharist, the Eucharistic Ministers gather around the altar.  I am on my knees watching as Father Lopez prays the words of the consecration. Because of the way the EM’s are standing, I have a very narrow, limited view.  It is as if I am looking through a telescope; there is a small opening between two EM’s where all my attention is focused.   While I peer through this opening, all I can see is the bread and Father’s hands.  Hands are over the bread.  They move up and down, blessing the bread. Hands lift up the transubstantiated bread that has become Jesus as I hear the words, “This is my body, given for you.”    I am struck by this view.  I see nothing but Father’s hands and bread that have become Jesus. It is as if they have united together, human hands and divine grace.   I will receive communion with Jesus today because Father has given his hands to be used for this grace.  I realize that if Father had not said, “Yes, Lord, I give you my hands to do your Will,” I would not be able to have this great grace I am about to receive.   All over the world, there are hands offering this grace that would not be available without the ”Yes” of God’s servants called to priesthood.

I am struck with the simplicity with which our Lord offers greatness.  I am struck by the faith given to our priests, who said “Yes Lord, my hands are yours.  My thoughts, my body, my heart-all of me is yours.”

I am filled with gratitude that you said ”Yes” and gave yourself to our Lord and His will. Just wanted to say thank you.   It was truly a blessed Christmas, and the best gifts I received were not wrapped or sitting under a tree. 

As we enter Advent, let us be open to the gifts of the Holy Spirit and

let us show appreciation and gratitude for our priests, pastors and other religious leaders.

Father, Will You Hold Me?

28 Oct 2011 1 Comment

by jeanbriese in Family Reflection, General, Reflections Of A Catholic Woman Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

It was a Monday morning like every other, and I was very focused on getting everything “ready” for the busy week ahead. Get Alli’s breakfast ready, get ready for work, prep food for dinner, make sure the house is picked up before I leave. “Alli, are you ready to go?” I called.

 “Grandma.”

 “Yes, Alli,” I responded, as I looked down to gaze into the eyes of now four-year-old Allison.

 Alli stood next to me looking up expectantly and, when her eyes caught mine, she asked, “Grandma, will you hold me?”

“Yes, Alli, yes I will. Let’s sit down and let me love on you.” A wide smile crossed her face as we headed over to the couch, and I scooped her into my arms.

Oh, the embrace. What a wonderful gift it is. As I wrapped my arms around Allison, I gave thanks for this little girl who gives me pause and helps me on a daily basis to remember my true priorities. What is more important than love? As we sat, my world, my day became calmer. A peace swept over me, so that I too felt embraced in love.

 
As I drove in to work later that day, listening to KLOVE radio, the DJ read their “encouraging word” for the day, from Mark 10:14-16 “Let the children come to me; do not prevent them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. Amen, I say to you, whoever does not accept the kingdom of God like a child will not enter it. Then He embraced them, placing His hands on them.”

I need to go to Christ as a child?   My mind flashed back to Allison, gazing up at me, with full faith that I will provide whatever she needs.  Breakfast, no worries, she knows she will be fed.  Clothes and shoes for school, no worries, she knows they will be provided.  Home with her own place to sleep, provided.  Toys for playing and growing, yes, provided.  All of her needs, many of her wants are provided.  She never worries that these will be provided.  She trusts fully.   Loved unconditionally on a daily basis, yes, of that she knows.  And when she needs an embrace, she asks, without hesitation, without fear, “Grandma, will you hold me?”

Her request is rewarded with a few special moments on my lap, wrapped in loving protective arms.  She can feel my breath as I whisper “I love you” softly to her, and I feel her breath when she responds.  This intimate embrace brings us together, brings us to peace.

Father in heaven, will you hold me?  I want to come to you like a child.  Take away my worries and let me know that you will provide all I need. Father, let me sit in your lap. Let me feel your arms around me. Let me feel your breath whisper to me, “I love you.” Let me whisper back, “I love you too.”   And let our breath mingle and bond us together and bring us both the satisfaction and peace of just sitting in love’s embrace.

      Give me, Father, the gift of coming to you like a child, in full faith.

Trying On Mary

12 Jun 2011 Leave a Comment

by jeanbriese in Family Reflection, General, Reflections Of A Catholic Woman Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

It was a hot summer day at the end of a stressful month.  Already June, we had missed our May trip north to park our camping trailer for the summer months.  Usually a trip we anticipate with the excitement of an eight-year old waiting for Christmas morn, today it felt like a chore.  I was only a few months into a new and demanding job, that while I loved, was an adjustment for our entire family.   At the beginning of May we lost our beloved family matriarch, my mother-in-law.  A large family and an even larger loss, my husband named executor of the family trust, May had been one stressful month.

And then I saw it.   At first glance, just another post on Facebook.  Posted by a friend from WINGS,  our women’s group at church.  It simply read:

My To Do List:

Sing

Smile at strangers

Keep learning

Notice kindness

Eat ice cream

Hope

Count my blessings

Laugh

Love

Love some more

It hit me like a ton of bricks.  My first thought was, “Wouldn’t it be great if that could be my to do list?”  Then I wondered, “Do people really act on these to do lists, or are they just a nice thing to post?”  Finally I thought,  “Why not?”

As women we have so much to do.  I am a wife, a mother, a daughter, a grandmother, an auntie, a sister, a friend, a BFF , an employee, a boss, a child of God’s and oh yeah ………ME.   Each of these roles in my life comes with its own list of “To Dos.”  Then you add in the holidays and seasons.   Yikes, I’m getting tired thinking about it.

I pulled up the task list in my phone and read the errands for the day:  Drop off dry cleaning,  submit expense report, draft business strategy for increasing hardware sales,  pick up milk on way home.

Now I should tell you, I am an extreme Martha personality.  You know the story, Jesus is dining with friends and Martha is busy cooking, cleaning, preparing and serving.  And there is Mary, sitting at the feet of Jesus listening to his every word.  Martha is angered.   And Jesus tells her that she is fretting over many things and that Mary has chosen the better part.  Luke 10:39

This is in direct conflict with our American culture. It is in direct conflict with who I am as a person. I am Martha.  I see the things that need to be done, and I get busy. This characteristic has served me well.  I am a results-oriented woman who has enjoyed success in my career thanks to my “getting things done.”  So every time I hear this story, I react like Martha. “Seriously, Jesus?  How the heck is that fair? Tell Mary to help.”   One morning I am sitting in Mass and Luke 10:39 is read and our pastor says, “Jesus wasn’t saying we shouldn’t work.  Jesus was saying that God’s work will get done, we don’t have to fret about it.  He was saying there is a time to listen to Jesus.  Take the time.”

So I moved my tasks to another day and copied Michelle’s To Do List into my phone.  I had decided that it is time for me to see what it is like to be Mary.

At first my husband rolled his eyes at me when I announced that we had a lot on our to do list and read the list to him.  But as I crossed each item off my list, funny things began to happen.  As we pulled out of the driveway for our trip up north, we tackled item #1, Sing.  As a family we took turns picking songs to sing.  What a great way to start our day! That certainly lightened the mood.  Next we counted our blessings.  This was fun as each of us took turns thinking of blessings and seeing how many we could count.  I began to feel blessed and de-stressed.   It wasn’t long before even my husband was enjoying the list.   He was mildly excited about learning something new.   After three years of owning our truck, we finally learned what the red blinking dot on our rearview mirror meant (it was pretty cool too.)  He really became engaged in the list when I announced it was time to eat ice cream.  Little Alli joined in the fun as we all began to look for opportunities to extend kindness and smile at strangers.  Alli enjoyed holding the door for people, saying hi and smiling.    The entire mood of our day lifted as our priorities shifted.  As we got down to only a few items, I admit, I downloaded an app on my phone called “funny jokes” and read them aloud until we were all laughing.  What a blessed day;   laughing, smiling at strangers, helping others and sharing all these important things as a family.

Thank you Michelle for the list. Thank you Mary for knowing when the important thing is to just sit and let Jesus speak to you.  Thank you Jesus for a blessed, blessed day.

Find time to be Mary.  Focus on what is truly important.

Heavenly Thoughts

06 Jun 2011 4 Comments

by jeanbriese in Family Reflection, Reflections Of A Catholic Woman

As someone who grew up in a non-traditional home, the Catholic faith has always had much to offer me.  A family, a family history, traditions, positive role models, a loving Mother, a just, merciful Father and most of all unconditional love. And Jesus, who told me that I deserved to be loved not for something I did or didn’t do, but just because I am made in His image.  All things I never knew as a child.

The oldest of 4 children, each of us with different fathers, ours was a life lived on edge. It was a life that made me who I am today, and I appreciate the characteristics that my life has provided. I am often told that people see me as one of the most confident women they know.  They see me as a strong woman.  If they only knew!  What appears as confidence is a lifelong realization that things must get done, whether I know how to do them or not, whether there is someone to teach me or not.  Consequently I don’t fear the unknown.   What appears as strong is growing up having to deal with unthinkable circumstances.

Embracing my faith has been a lifelong journey.  I heard a beautiful song on the radio the other day with a verse about going to heaven and being greeted by your loved ones.

What seems to be a beautiful thought caused me distress.  Who was going to greet me in heaven?  Certainly not my family.  My mother, an alcoholic most of my childhood, gave up God long before I was born.  Some of the things that occurred in my past are too unthinkable to put into writing.  God can forgive all, but to my knowledge, none of these people have asked for God’s forgiveness, even denying His existence.  My brothers both in prison, my sister and I fighting our own demons, ours is a lost family.

I am consumed with sadness at the thought.  When all these families are reunited in heaven, who is going to meet me?

And Jesus responds to me. He will be there.  He will be there, as He has been since I can remember, even though my parents did not believe in God or practice any faith in our home. At eight years old I felt “called” to seek God, so I walked to a church near our home seeking to know the God who spoke to me. Jesus has been with me throughout my life and He responds now,  He will be there waiting for me in heaven.

Still, will it be Jesus and me, while other families are reunited with happy, healed and perfect family members?  It occurs to me, God can heal my mother too. He can heal her pain, her suffering.

I often struggle with the commandment to honor your father and mother. How do you honor a father and mother who used, abused, neglected and abandoned their children?

And so I turn to the Word of God for answers. Surely if God gave us this commandment, there will be some words to guide me.  And I see the great King David, persecuted by Saul yet forever steadfast in his loyalty to God.  Neither does he place himself in harm’s way.   Even as he must hide to save his life, he honors Saul in word and deed.  Saul seeks to have David murdered.  David is afforded an opportunity to easily kill Saul, and he refrains, choosing to let Saul’s fate be determined by God.  He honors God and he respects (without placing himself in harm’s way) God’s chosen one, even though that chosen one has become his persecutor.  David goes into hiding and bides his time.  David is richly rewarded for his loyalty and faithfulness and become the great King David.

(Read this entire story in 1 Samuel, it is incredible.)

And so God today I thank you and praise you for family.  I have a wonderful husband of 33 years; I have beautiful children and grandchildren.  Like David, I have been richly blessed.  Like David, I want to sing and dance your praises!   Thank you for giving me this beautiful family.

This week let us all treat our family members as if they are royalty.  Let us love them and serve them, honoring the gift they are to us.  Imagine if each family member treated the other in this manner.

Father, let Love and Light triumph in all families.

The Little Lamb’s Prayer

27 May 2011 1 Comment

by jeanbriese in Family Reflection, Reflections Of A Catholic Woman Tags: , , , , , ,

As we said morning prayers yesterday, I prayed that God would give me guidance throughout my day, asking for wisdom and patience at work.  I prayed that God would watch over Alli while she is at school and I turned to Alli and said, “What gift would you like Jesus to give you today while you are at school?  Would you like kindness, or maybe gentleness?  Alli pondered for a moment and then her eyes lit up and she enthusiastically replied, “Bring Miss Emily back.”

Miss Emily was her pre-school teacher for the past six months.  A loving, compassionate young woman who guided a class of preschoolers every day,   Allison spent about eight hours a day with Miss Emily.  About two weeks ago, she left Arizona to move to Alaska.

When Alli responds “Bring Miss Emily back,” it is a wake-up call to me.  While my life is relatively unchanged since Miss Emily left, I see now that Allison’s has been greatly effected.   So I tell Allison that while we probably aren’t going to be able to have Miss Emily back, maybe we can get her email address and write a message to her.  She smiles and is happy about this prospect.

We get to school and I tell the director the story of our morning prayer. She reacts as I did, with a big, “Awhhhh.”  She provides  us with Miss Emily’s email address so we can reach out to her.

That evening, I sit with Alli and type out an email to Miss Emily.  I read to Alli what I am typing.   “Dear Miss Emily, How is Alaska?  We miss you.”   At this point Alli responds.  “I love you.”   So I tell Miss Emily that Alli wants me to tell her that she loves her.

As I sit in my daily meditation the next morning, the events of the last couple of days play over in my mind and I am overwhelmed.

Miss Robyn is the new teacher in Room 9.  Allison hugs Miss Robin and seems to get along with her just fine.  However, since Miss Emily has been gone, Alli cries every day when I drop her off at pre-school.  She has begun to have “accidents” at  nap time, even though she has rarely had an “accident” at home. It dawns on me that my little Allison is grieving the loss of a beloved friend and caregiver.  Not unlike any loss, it is taking its toll on little Alli.  And Allison, at three-years-old cannot articulate her feelings to tell the adults in her life that she is grieving.

But Wow, God!  You know our hearts and our innermost desires. You know exactly what we need.  And in our morning prayer time, you answer a little girl’s heartfelt prayer.  You give the adults in her life the awareness to help her through this first of many transitions and losses she will weather in her lifetime.  You alone saw her pain. You alone felt her loss.  And now in a moment of prayer, you bring to Allison what she needs, even when she doesn’t have the words to express it or the knowledge to ask for it.  You bring her loving parents with awareness and the knowledge to help Allison in her three-year-old suffering.   You are so amazing.

I have seen You at work throughout my life.  I have heard testimonies of others who witnessed your work in their lives.  I am overwhelmed at this witness of how you work in the life of someone who’s suffering and innermost need was hidden, and who literally did not have the ability to communicate her needs.

And yet, here you are Good Shepherd, caring for your littlest lamb.  I am so humbled.  I have a whole new understanding of Isaiah 49:15; Can a mother forget her nursing child? Can she feel no love for a child she has borne? But even if that were possible, I would not forget you!  I love this child entrusted to me, yet I did not see her suffering.   I am so aware of how your love for us is so much more than any love we have experienced. And I pledge to raise this child up to know You and to walk in Your ways and continue to grow in her love and purpose for You.

Alli’s simple, “Bring Miss Emily back” was a key spoken during prayer that unlocked her needs. I am so thankful for prayer. And I am embarrassed that each morning as I prayed with Alli, I foolishly thought that as the adult, I was leading the prayer and teaching Alli the benefits of prayer, that some day she might be able to ask and receive blessings on her own.   I now realize that in our prayer,  you are leading each one of us.  All we have to do is make the effort.  You will do the rest.  No matter how foolish, no matter how small, no matter our ability.  It is You.  It is Love.  Lord you humble me and show me your greatness.  I am awe-struck that you answered Alli’s prayer and gave me a visible witness to the great Love that you have for each one of us.  Thank you for watching over Alli and thank you for watching over me.

Make the effort today.  Pray.

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